Of all the media sacred cows whose flatulence assails the populace, the editorial board of the Washington Post emits the most consistently repellent methane afflatus. It trades on a reputation for liberalism that does not pass anywhere with a greater population density than Podunk’s. Yet the Post’s local involvement is often even more egregiously wrong-headed than, say, its continuous cheerleading for the US’s Iraq military debacle.
In its defense the Post’s news department doesn’t always succumb to the editorial department’s lines. But the editorial department quite frequently ignores the news. Aside from that systemic failure, specific instances of mis-, mal-, sub- and non-feasance in Post editorials are sufficiently common that they crush anyone still awaiting leftist domination of multimillion dollar organs of public opinion.
Some may say that editorially the Post is at least better than the Washington Times. Unfortunately, such an assertion implies that the Times either values or practices objectivity, fairness, or dedication to any cause other than the greater glory of the Republican party. The Post’s mistakes are at any rate consistently bipartisan. They get both parties wrong whereas, giving color to suspicions of collusion, the Times is always right about the Republicans.
The Post’s [then-]latest editorial disfigurement of public discourse (“Without Further Delay,” Tuesday, December 5, 2006; Page A28) comes disguised as a good-government plea. In its plodding, misguided way, however, the Post imagines that favoring a full vote for one District of Columbia member of the House of Representatives does not also forever prevent DC’s US Senate representation.
Asking smugly, “Which congressional leader cares to explain why District voters should remain disenfranchised?” the Post also forgets that the [then-]109th Congress’ Republican leadership has long adhered to the line that DC cannot be represented in either House or Senate because that is the way the District was set up 225 years ago. It is an article of Republican faith that, with full legislative power over DC vested in Congress, somehow Congress must not exercise that power in any way other than preventing a commuter tax, preventing DC referenda on legalized marijuana, preventing a needle-exchange program, or preventing DC firearms legislation.
The Post starts off grandly but soon stumbles. “THE PEOPLE of the District of Columbia shouldn't have to wait another minute, let alone another month, to get the full voting representation in government that is their due as Americans.” Only one problem. The DC Fair and Equal House Voting Rights Act (H.R. 5388) does not provide “full voting representation in government.” Full voting representation would be a US House member (based on a 2000 Census population of 600,000) and two US Senators. In addition there would have to be a Governor, Lieutenant Governor, State Legislature (bi- or unicameral) and whatever other constitutional officers might be provided under the terms of admission as a State. There might even be a City government under the State, if the State decided to create one. But the Post’s use of the term, “full,” to modify “representation,” is obviously one with which the rest of the world is unfamiliar, plainly meaning as it does in this case, “partial.”
DC needs Statehood to achieve proper voting representation. One House member is a degrading and deficient compromise that prevents rather than implements complete political involvement. Remember H.R. 5388 was a Republican compromise intended to protect the party from Democratic Senators. After its inexorable demise while the 109th vote[d] on the vital question of fetal nerve endings, Democrats should not [have] waste[d] any time rescusitating it in the 110th.
Instead, under its otherwise tattered and threadbare Home Rule Charter the existing DC Mayor and Council should boldly act. Receive a petition from their citizens to incorporate (as the Territory of Ellingtonia) all of DC except a quadrangle surrounding the Capitol, the Mall and the White House. That quadrangle would remain the Federal District. The existing District Government would transfer all its functions and personnel to the Territorial Government. The Territory of New Columbia would then petition Congress for admission as a State.
The current DC Government certainly has the power to receive citizen petitions and to act on them. As long as Congress does not explicitly forbid DC to reorganize as a Territory, it could entertain the subsequent Statehood petition with a clean conscience. Excluding a rump Federal District for both Constitutional and practical reasons (the House and Senate District Committees, not Territorial taxpayers, would have to pay for future police and fire protection within the rump area) makes the scheme not only workable but pleasantly sardonic. Meantime, contributions from a Territorial commuter tax toward permanent funding for Metro operations and Chesapeake Bay cleanup could shame Maryland and Virginia into following the Territory’s fine lead on the two largest, longest-term problems confronting the entire region.
The fight for Statehood would be harsh but would be clearly based on equal justice under the law. As an act of civic consciousness the Territorial Constitution could allow voting only for Territorial officers, leaving the Electoral College to draft Electors if it felt it needed any during the period prior to full Statehood. The fait accompli of Territoriality would change the Statehood discourse forever and avoid the shameful and shoddy minimalism of having just one Congresscritter. The DC Fair and Equal House Voting Rights Act is neither fair nor equal, merely convenient.
[Although written at the end of 2006, this is unfortunately still true...]
Monday, October 19, 2009
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
The People's Petition
The People’s Petition
Whereas:
The people of the former District of Columbia desire, deserve and demand full citizenship rights in the place where they live and work.
Be it resolved by the undersigned:
That the City Council of the former District of Columbia is hereby petitioned to declare itself the Territorial Senate of the Territory of Ellingtonia, declaring as well the inclusion of the Non-Voting Delegate of the District of Columbia to the United States House of Representatives as the thirteenth Territorial Senator.
That the Advisory Neighborhood Commissioners of the former District of Columbia are hereby petitioned to declare themselves the Territorial House of Representatives of the Territory of Ellingtonia, declaring as well the inclusion of the Shadow Representative and Shadow Senators as Territorial Representatives.
That the Mayor of the former District of Columbia is hereby petitioned to declare himself the Territorial Governor of the Territory of Ellingtonia pro tem and to submit a referendum to the people as to whether the citizens of the former District of Columbia ratify the holder of that office as the Territorial Governor of the Territory of Ellingtonia, ratify the procedure of petitioning Congress for admission of the Territory of Ellingtonia to Statehood, and ratify a Territorial Constitution.
That the Territorial Governor of the Territory of Ellingtonia is hereby petitioned to submit a proposed Territorial Constitution to the Territorial Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia, the resultant Constitution to be submitted to the people in referendum as above.
That the Territorial Governor and Territorial Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia are hereby petitioned to define the boundaries of the Territory as coterminous with those of the former (post-1847) District of Columbia, with the exception of a linked block of land encompassing the Capitol, the Supreme Court, the Mall, the White House and the Executive Office Buildings. The excepted block of land will remain as the District of Columbia under the sole authority of the Congress of the United States, with no residents, no representation and no voting rights, with its law enforcement provided by the Executive Protection Service, the US Capitol Police, and the US Supreme Court Police, and its fire service either contracted from the Territory of Ellingtonia or independently established at no cost to the Territory's citizens.
That the Territorial Governor and Territorial Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia are hereby petitioned to adopt the District Judiciary as the Territorial Judiciary and make provision for a State Judiciary to become effective at Statehood.
That upon approval of the above referendum and simultaneous or subsequent ratification of the Territorial Constitution, the Territorial Governor and Territorial Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia are hereby authorized to petition the Congress of the United States for admission to Statehood as the Fifty-First State.
That the Territorial Flag of the Territory of Ellingtonia adapt the design of the former District of Columbia flag with the substitution of a red ball, chain and leg clamp in place of the three stars currently displayed above the two red bars on the white field, with provision to revert to the three stars at such time as the State of Ellingtonia is admitted to the United States.
That the citizens of the Territory of Ellingtonia be asked to voluntarily abstain from casting their votes for the office of President of the United States until such time as the State of Ellingtonia is admitted to the United States as a symbolic statement of the inadequacies of Home Rule.
That the statue of Boss Alexander Robey Shepherd (1835-1902) be moved to the intersections of Pennsylvania and Constitution Avenues NW in a mini-traffic-circle, taking a lane of traffic away from each direction at that spot, on Emancipation Day 2010, to remain emplaced there until such time as the State of Ellingtonia is admitted to the United States.
Whereas:
The people of the former District of Columbia desire, deserve and demand full citizenship rights in the place where they live and work.
Be it resolved by the undersigned:
That the City Council of the former District of Columbia is hereby petitioned to declare itself the Territorial Senate of the Territory of Ellingtonia, declaring as well the inclusion of the Non-Voting Delegate of the District of Columbia to the United States House of Representatives as the thirteenth Territorial Senator.
That the Advisory Neighborhood Commissioners of the former District of Columbia are hereby petitioned to declare themselves the Territorial House of Representatives of the Territory of Ellingtonia, declaring as well the inclusion of the Shadow Representative and Shadow Senators as Territorial Representatives.
That the Mayor of the former District of Columbia is hereby petitioned to declare himself the Territorial Governor of the Territory of Ellingtonia pro tem and to submit a referendum to the people as to whether the citizens of the former District of Columbia ratify the holder of that office as the Territorial Governor of the Territory of Ellingtonia, ratify the procedure of petitioning Congress for admission of the Territory of Ellingtonia to Statehood, and ratify a Territorial Constitution.
That the Territorial Governor of the Territory of Ellingtonia is hereby petitioned to submit a proposed Territorial Constitution to the Territorial Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia, the resultant Constitution to be submitted to the people in referendum as above.
That the Territorial Governor and Territorial Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia are hereby petitioned to define the boundaries of the Territory as coterminous with those of the former (post-1847) District of Columbia, with the exception of a linked block of land encompassing the Capitol, the Supreme Court, the Mall, the White House and the Executive Office Buildings. The excepted block of land will remain as the District of Columbia under the sole authority of the Congress of the United States, with no residents, no representation and no voting rights, with its law enforcement provided by the Executive Protection Service, the US Capitol Police, and the US Supreme Court Police, and its fire service either contracted from the Territory of Ellingtonia or independently established at no cost to the Territory's citizens.
That the Territorial Governor and Territorial Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia are hereby petitioned to adopt the District Judiciary as the Territorial Judiciary and make provision for a State Judiciary to become effective at Statehood.
That upon approval of the above referendum and simultaneous or subsequent ratification of the Territorial Constitution, the Territorial Governor and Territorial Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia are hereby authorized to petition the Congress of the United States for admission to Statehood as the Fifty-First State.
That the Territorial Flag of the Territory of Ellingtonia adapt the design of the former District of Columbia flag with the substitution of a red ball, chain and leg clamp in place of the three stars currently displayed above the two red bars on the white field, with provision to revert to the three stars at such time as the State of Ellingtonia is admitted to the United States.
That the citizens of the Territory of Ellingtonia be asked to voluntarily abstain from casting their votes for the office of President of the United States until such time as the State of Ellingtonia is admitted to the United States as a symbolic statement of the inadequacies of Home Rule.
That the statue of Boss Alexander Robey Shepherd (1835-1902) be moved to the intersections of Pennsylvania and Constitution Avenues NW in a mini-traffic-circle, taking a lane of traffic away from each direction at that spot, on Emancipation Day 2010, to remain emplaced there until such time as the State of Ellingtonia is admitted to the United States.
Monday, May 21, 2007
Make DC Auto-Free!
The Moonie Times sez:
City Will Charge Georgetown Residents for Extra ParkingSlangwhanger sez: Need to plow National Airport under, build a 27-story parking garage, have people park there and take the metro home to Georgetown or wherever. Make DC auto-free!
WASHINGTON - Monday May 21, 2007 6:14 am
Many Georgetown residents are upset that D.C. officials want to charge them a fee for parking in front of their driveways.
The effort to ease the neighborhood parking shortage is a six-month pilot project set to begin this summer. The Department of Transportation will allow Georgetown residents to buy a permit to block their own access.
DCDOT spokeswoman Karyn LeBlanc says officials haven't decided how much to charge.
Residents already pay $15 a year for permits allowing them to park their cars on blocks near their houses.
Al Wheeler of the Georgetown Kiwanis Club says D-DOT staffers have told him they could cost about $180. He says it's good that the city is bringing parking relief to Georgetown, but it's unfair to generate revenue at the neighborhood's expense.
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Another Blog about DC Statehood
Strom is dead, already! Let's get on with it! DC Statehood is a perfect opportunity to restructure the District Government as well as providing full representation in House and Senate to DC citizens. It would also take DC out from under the paternalistic requirement of submitting all its legislation for Congressional review.
My statehood model calls for DC citizens to petition the Mayor, City Council, and Advisory Neighborhood Commissions to declare themselves the Territorial Governor, Senate and Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia. The Territory excludes a block of land having no residents that surrounds the Supreme Court, the Capitol, the Mall and the White House. That area becomes the Rump District of Columbia under full Congressional oversight, policing, fire, etc. The Territory then petitions Congress for admission as a state and, by majority vote with no Constitutional amendment foolishness, the deed is crowned with success.
Why Ellingtonia? Because it is fitting that at least one state be named after a black person, preferably a locally-born one who contributed to world beauty and civilization. [The eleven states named after individual people are George Washington (WA), King Charles II (NC, SC), King George III (GA), Queen Mary (MD), Queen Elizabeth I (VA, WV), King Louis XIV (LA), James, Duke of York (NY), Lord Delaware (DE) and William Penn (PA).]
More speculations, correspondence with elected officials, and other polemics about DC life will appear here as time and chance permit. The Slangwhanger-in-Chief is happy to resume his blogging smock and sandalled shoon for this limited purpose.
My statehood model calls for DC citizens to petition the Mayor, City Council, and Advisory Neighborhood Commissions to declare themselves the Territorial Governor, Senate and Legislature of the Territory of Ellingtonia. The Territory excludes a block of land having no residents that surrounds the Supreme Court, the Capitol, the Mall and the White House. That area becomes the Rump District of Columbia under full Congressional oversight, policing, fire, etc. The Territory then petitions Congress for admission as a state and, by majority vote with no Constitutional amendment foolishness, the deed is crowned with success.
Why Ellingtonia? Because it is fitting that at least one state be named after a black person, preferably a locally-born one who contributed to world beauty and civilization. [The eleven states named after individual people are George Washington (WA), King Charles II (NC, SC), King George III (GA), Queen Mary (MD), Queen Elizabeth I (VA, WV), King Louis XIV (LA), James, Duke of York (NY), Lord Delaware (DE) and William Penn (PA).]
More speculations, correspondence with elected officials, and other polemics about DC life will appear here as time and chance permit. The Slangwhanger-in-Chief is happy to resume his blogging smock and sandalled shoon for this limited purpose.
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